


Birthday Cake

by suallenparker



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, Birthday Cake, F/M, Fluff, Hope, Love Confession, Relationship Talk, birthday fic, happy end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-26
Updated: 2014-11-26
Packaged: 2018-02-27 02:51:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2676230
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/suallenparker/pseuds/suallenparker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Phil brings Melinda a birthday cake and they discuss things they’ve been avoiding.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Birthday Cake

**Author's Note:**

> This was written for the second Make ‘Em Kiss Challenge I ran on my Tumblr. A kind anon prompted: Melinda’s birthday, (in keeping with current canon). - I blame ALL the angst in this story on them. That’s what you get for asking me to keep things in current canon. I hope you enjoy this, friends!

She doesn’t expect him to come to her. Ever since he asked her to shoot him in the head, he hadn’t come to her. He said his piece, he made her promise and that was that. Ever since then, she avoided him. When she isn’t close, she can’t shoot him in the head. Simple as that.

But the carving stopped. He slept for more then a few minutes and he seems so much better lately. Sure, they’re searching for a city the alien blood in his body made him draw over and over again without knowing what they’re supposed to find in that city, but the carving stopped. And in the near future she most likely won’t have to shoot him in the head.

Still, she’s surprised when he knocks at her door one evening. It’s not that late, about quarter past nine. He smiles as he balances a big plate on his right hand while he hides his left behind his back.

She looks at what’s on the plate and raises a brow. “That’s chocolate cake.”

"Your favorite." He grins, obviously very pleased with himself.

She pulls her brow a little higher.

He shakes his head and his grin deepens. “You forgot.”

Forgot what? What could she possibly have forgotten about cake? What? Oh my. Her eyes widened. “It’s my birthday.”

“Yes.”

"And you brought me cake."

"And this." He pulls his left hand from behind his back and offers her a little parcel, wrapped in red paper.

With a questioning look she takes it from him and peels the paper of, as he now supports the chocolate cake with both hands.

Once the gift is unwrapped, she looks at him again. “Assam tea?”

"Your favorite," he says with a grin.

Oh gosh, that man! She presses her lips together and stares at the tea in her hands. He’s so kind and attentive and wonderful. She doesn’t want to lose him. Even the thought of it kills her.

He frowns. “What’s wrong?”

"Nothing.” She looks up and smiles at him. “Just …” He isn’t carving anymore. They have more time to find a fix. That’s something. And now he’s here with her. “Thank you, Phil."

“I’m fine, you know that, right?” he asks.

“I know.” For now.

“So stop worrying.”

She tries. But he’s the most important person and even though they gained some breathing room, she just feels this isn’t over yet.

“At least for today,” he adds with a smile.

She nods shortly and smiles back.

He lifts up the cake and tilts his head. “Gonna share your cake?”

"With you?” She grins.

"I have two forks!" Shifting the weight of the plated cake to his right hand again, he reaches into his left jacket pocket and pulls out two forks. She loves his ability to lighten up even her darkest moods. He looks so very pleased with himself, so charming, she can just smile at him. She wants to kiss him.

She opens her door wider and gestures him to come in. After she put down the tea on her nightstand, they sit on her bed with the cake between them and he hands her a fork.

He waits for her to take the first bite of cake. As soon as the chocolate-y richness hits her mouth, she closes her eyes and sighs with happy bliss that very good cake can bring.

“It’s good, isn’t it?” She hears the grin in his voice even before she opens her eyes and sees it.

She nods and forks up another bite. It’s so very good! He tilts his head and looks at her with that little smile on his face. His fork rests in midair. Thus fair it hasn’t even touched the cake. When he looks at her like that, she wonders what’s going though his mind. She knows she’s important to him. She knows he trusts her the most. - He said that. - But how he looks at her now … it wakes old hopes for something more. Which is ridiculous because he’s in love with Audrey.

So she looks away and focuses on the cake, before she can do something stupid like reach out for him. Or kiss him. “Heard you got your tie back,” she says and fills her mouth with more cake.

“Yes.” He forks up some cake too.

She glances at him. “Do you miss her a lot? Audrey?”

“Yes.”He smiles sadly and avoids her gaze. “She was a good lesson.”

“What?”

“When I met her I thought that for me there would be just work, but then …” He shrugs. “She made me dream again.”

“We’ll get you back to normal and then you can go back to her.” She really, really wants that for him. He deserves a break. He deserves to be happy. And Audrey makes him happy. It’s in his voice whenever he mentions her.

“What would you do if you could just do anything?” he asks. “If you weren’t trapped with –“ He presses his lips together and she frowns at him.

“I’m not trapped,” she says.

He pokes the cake with his fork. He feels guilty, she knows. It’s why he keeps his distance. Tough choices …

“Phil. I’m not trapped. I’m exactly where I want to be.”

He snorts. “You always had a great sense for duty.”

“This isn’t duty. I believe in our cause, yes, but that’s not why I’m here.” She reaches over and covers hand with hers, keeping him from crumbling the cake even more. She waits until he looks at her again. “I’m not trapped,” she repeats slowly. Wherever he is, she wants to be with him as long as she can be. As long as he lets her. As long as he needs her. She loves him so much!

“May, please …” He looks even guiltier. She pulls her hand away.

“I don’t need you to love me back,” she says. She means that. That’s not how love works. She knows he can’t change his feelings. Sure, sometimes she feels jealous and selfish and needy in her love for him. But she doesn’t want to fall out of love. She doesn’t think she can. She just wants to fall out of heartbreak. “Don’t need your pity either.” She grins at him and licks a crumb of cake from her top lip.

He looks away and presses his lips together. He looks so tense all of a sudden. Crap.

“I didn’t say that to make you sad,” she says. She means that, too. She knows he’s lonely. And scared and worried. She’s too. She wishes he’d let her in.

“I’m so sorry, Melinda,” he mumbles. “I’m so very sorry.” There’re tears pooling in his eyes and she can’t take it anymore. She drops the fork, pushes the cake out of the way and wraps her arms around his neck.

Taking a shaky breath, he loops his arms around her waist. She shifts over closer and they just hold each other, breathing. She’s fighting her own tears. They’re in such a damn mess!

“I never wanted to be your burden,” he whispers. “I thought I could be …” his voice breaks. “I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay.” She rubs his back.

“No, it’s really not. It’s not.”

She leans back and cradles his face. She brushes away the tears that ran down his cheek. “It’s not,” she agrees.

He sighs. “Now I ruined your birthday.”

“You didn’t.” She’s glad they have this. The contact. She’s glad he doesn’t pretend he’s okay with what’s happening to him. She caresses his face. She feels like for the first time ever since he showed her his carvings, he’s truly honest about himself.

He smiles again. “My original plan was to get you drunk enough to sing karaoke with me.”

She snorts. “I’d never get that drunk.”

“We both remember Barcelona very differently.”

“I don’t remember Barcelona at all.”

They look at each other smiling and she feels light. She feels closer to him than she had for month.

He leans into her touch. “I love you,” he says. His voice is soft and gentle.

It makes her choked up. She swallows hard. “Phil …”

“I thought this could be our second chance. You were my first thought after coming back to life. You’re always my first thought and I love you. I love you so very much. I wish you’d love somebody else.”

Love somebody else? “Why would I …?”

He shakes his head. “Asking you to take out your best friend is already to much. And if you’d love me that would be … How could I be that cruel?”

Oh gosh. “You won’t lose your mind,” she says. “We’ll find a solution to this and you’ll live and then …” She must believe there’s a future where he’s safe again. “You love me?”

“You’re too good for me, I know that, too.”

She presses her lips against his. She longed to kiss him for so very long. He feels fantastic. When she nibbles on his bottom lip, he sighs. His arms around her tighten and he opens his mouth. Their tongues touch and it’s electrifying. For a few moments she loses herself in his taste. Then she pulls back and looks at him.

“Never say that again,” she says sharply before she kisses him again. Because he’s good enough. Because she loves him and there just has to be hope.

And now she has some.


End file.
